It's not unusual for me to start a coaching session by asking, "What would make this conversation extraordinary for you?" That's because coaching is all about going from good to great—ordinary to extraordinary. But ironically, my greatest hope and wish for my clients, loved ones, and myself is to be consistently blessed with the ordinary.

What are the one or two questions you are asked most often? These questions reveal your priorities and values. In my life, two come up repeatedly: “What’s Life Coaching?” and “Why do you do Ultramarathon races?” Both illuminate how I cultivate confidence, face challenges, and expand my ability to do hard things.

Let me start by sharing a truth about parenting I’ve come to believe in wholeheartedly: “You can’t get it right.” Humility is the destination, and parenting is the most direct path to get there. Even when you think you’ve mastered one child, another will remind you how little you know, offering lessons in patience, perspective, and love.

“Why so hard on yourself?” I asked my not-yet-client, Linda. In one of our first discovery conversations, I look for those hidden signs that someone is truly ready to change. Over years of coaching women of all ages, I’ve seen a pattern: a deep internal judgment—especially of self—playing out silently, though felt loudly.

Carolyn, how do you balance healthy self-interest with the need to be fully present for those you care about?” a reader asked. His question arrived after I shared my conflict during a family visit in Lake Tahoe—feeling grateful yet stretched thin between work, parenting, and home life. Somehow, wherever I was, I felt I should be somewhere else.

“You’re like the human AI!” a client texted me after another book recommendation. The truth is, I’ve always been a reader—but the insights that shaped my life and coaching came not from endless consumption, but from learning how to digest what I read. Information only becomes wisdom when we engage with it, reflect on it, and apply it in our lives.

Recently, a friend asked me to share a piece of wisdom that has been a powerful force in my life. I explained that wisdom isn’t just knowledge—it’s metabolized insight we share with others. From “This, too, shall pass” to learning to become anti-fragile, these are lessons that guide how I navigate challenges, presence, and growth.

Recently, a friend asked me to share a piece of wisdom that has been a powerful force in my life. I explained that wisdom isn’t just knowledge—it’s metabolized insight we share with others. From “This, too, shall pass” to learning to become anti-fragile, these are lessons that guide how I navigate challenges, presence, and growth.

Personality is a myth. From childhood, we’re led to believe that who we are is fixed—but in truth, we are what we practice deliberately. Through consistent actions and a growth mindset, we can shape our habits, our behaviors, and ultimately, the Self we choose to become.

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on how certain emotions can feel like companions—uninvited ones that linger longer than expected. After losing my best friend of 40 years, I discovered that grief isn’t like other difficult emotions. It requires connection, care, and presence, and in learning to honor it, I found unexpected compassion, love, and generosity in my own life.

It took me back to my own high school graduation. I remember feeling just as grown-up, confident, capable, and eager for what was next. Only now, with hindsight, can I see how unprepared I truly was for adult life's complexities. I had plenty of information, but very little wisdom. So, decades later, I've reflected on what I wish I'd known back then.

The more time I spend outdoors, the deeper I fall in love with trees. Trees are the wisest teachers a human can have. Trees are everything I aspire to become. Trees are patient. Trees are generous. Trees don't question their worthiness or mine. Trees grow underground networks to help other trees thrive.

Is there something magical about Transformational Coaching? At first, it can feel that way. You start in a place that seems almost impossible to change—and somehow, you end up somewhere entirely different. Even when your external circumstances remain the same, everything has changed. But those of us who've experienced this kind of magic know it's anything but.

In last week's article, I shared two core pillars of Transformational Coaching: Radical Acceptance and Radical Responsibility. I've capitalized these concepts intentionally because I want them to stand apart from your everyday run-of-the-mill experiences of acceptance and responsibility. Radical means always, not sometimes. It means doing it when it's difficult, uncomfortable, and exactly what we don't want to do.

If I've learned one thing in my career as a Professional Coach, it's this: all change begins with Radical Acceptance. Think back on your life and identify one meaningful change you made that stayed with you. I promise you—it started with fully (and often painfully) accepting your current reality. Radical Acceptance is necessary, but not sufficient, to create the changes so many of us long for.

The fear of uncertainty is one of the most paralyzing obstacles for young adults. By cultivating the right mindset, clarifying identity, and using practical strategies, we can navigate change, take responsibility, and confidently thrive even when life feels unpredictable.

Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.” I’ve realized that fear has held me—and many young adults I coach—paralyzed. Some fears we can conquer; others take time. When we pair understanding with action, fear loses its power, and we can finally step into life fully.

This week, Jews all around the world are observing Passover, a recollection of our ancestors’ time as slaves and a grateful honoring of their journey to freedom. In looking at the rituals, I’m struck by the ways our modern “shackles”—fame, pleasure, money, and power—quietly limit our freedom today.

When I think about identity, I think about how we diagnose having multiple personalities as a disorder. Yet, most of us live lives with multiple personalities and don’t seem to think it’s a problem! We are different people depending on our role at any given moment.

“Why should I work with a Professional Coach?” It’s a question many of us silently ask. While our default future unfolds without effort, it may not be the one we want. Coaching helps us uncover what we truly desire, why it matters, when to act, and who can guide us—transforming hesitation into deliberate progress.